The Whitney Houston Hologram Reminds Me of the Start of Every Horror Film

You know that moment in the beginning of Paranormal Activity when the wife hints about a family curse and the idiot husband decided to fuck with the devil? His wife is like, “No, honey! Don’t fuck with the devil!” But Chad being the dumb fuck he is fucks with the devil anyway?

Also, who is this? The lying ass devil, that’s who.

This is exactly what it feels like when they announced that there’s a Whitney Houston Hologram and Tour on the way.

Despite the outcry of fans saying that the hologram and the tour is the exact opposite of what they want, her estate has decided to push for it anyway against their wishes.

I’m not religious in any way, but I’m just superstitious enough that I wouldn’t want to take any part in summoning a dead woman from the grave. It doesn’t sit well in my spirit. It probably doesn’t sit well in the spirit of others. Or the ancestors.

I understand that a lot of musicians and artists that die unexpectedly end up having a catalog of music or unfinished albums that were in the works of being put out eventually, but bringing back someone’s likeness from the dead as a means to worship the God of Capitalism is downright evil. Leave that woman alone.

We’ve seen how horror movies of this caliber end and it’s never good. The people in question will either get killed by the vengeful spirit of Whitney Houston who just wanted to be left the hell alone to chill in heaven with God and Prince, or it’s going to be like Raiders of the Lost Ark where everyone’s faces melt and their heads explode.


When that happens, it’ll be their own damn fault. Can’t say we didn’t try to warn you.

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